Millions of people across the country are putting pressure on themselves to hit key life milestones by over-estimating how early in life they feel they should achieve them, new research has found. The research, released today by leading online jobs board totaljobs, highlights a clear disparity between reality and expectation when it comes to what age Brits expect to hit key life milestones.
The survey, which spoke to 6,756 workers aged 18 and over, appeared to highlight that the Fear of Missing Out remains very much alive and well. It would appear that these anxieties begin to impact youngsters as soon as they get behind the wheel of a car.
Whilst many people commence driving lessons around their 17th birthday, the average age for a Brit to pass their driving test is actually 26! However, it is clear that many young people place pressure on themselves to pass sooner, with three quarters expecting to have passed by their 21st birthday.
Part of the problem for people up and down the country is a belief that peers are racing ahead of them on the path to life’s major milestones. Today’s figures suggest young people, more than ever, have a tendency to assume their friends are way ahead of them on life’s journey. Much probably to do with social media such as Instagram and Facebook.
For example, just under a third of us believe colleagues and friends have a better housing situation than we do, and many believe their peers have a better retirement plan, with a further 31% believing their friends and colleagues maintain a better lifestyle than they do.
These anxieties appear to touch other areas of adult life. While nearly three-quarters of Brits said they expected to be married by the age of 30, the average age for men to get married in the UK is 34, while for women it is 31. This is even older in the LGBT community, where the average man gets married at 38 and the average woman ties the knot at 35.
Brits are even premature in whey they see themselves in later life. The average person expects to retire aged 63, in spite of the fact that the state pension age is expected to increase to 66 in October 2020, with further rises expected at the end of the next decade.
Longer life expectancy is leading to an increasing state retirement age – despite this, Brits across the country are determined to retire as early as possible, which is likely to lead to disappointment for the majority.
One factor that is clearly linked between the setting of our goals and achieving them is how much we are confiding our goals in others. While nearly two-thirds say they have shared their goals with their families, this drops to just 44% who have shared their life goal timetable with their friends, and an even lower 28% have declared them at the office.
As highlighted by John Lees, career strategist, other people play a large part in the fulfilling of our personal goals. Confiding in others gives us an alternative perspective on our goals and ensures we are making steps to achieve them rather than let them remain a dream.
David Clift, HR Director at totaljobs comments, “Many people feel its important to set personal goals at the start if the year to help them assess their progress on a regular basis.
Our survey suggests that whilst this is a key life skill, people should be aware of what is realistic in the UK in 2018 and not constantly rush to compare their lives with their peer group. If individuals are setting goals that are unachievable, they can be left disappointed by a perceived lack of progress, which in itself can be demotivating.
We hope by shining a light on the average age when people hit life milestones, we can provide some assurances that there is no mad rush and everyone develops at their own pace”.
Setting more effective goals
We teamed up with Totaljobs and career strategist John Less to outline six steps to more effective goal setting, in order to have a better chance at succeeding in fulfilling personal or professional goals:
1. Review your whole career so you can talk about it as one story, with each stage showing positive decision-making.
2. Talk to people in jobs that look interesting. Find out what these roles are really like and what’s happening in their work sectors.
3. Sit down with a coach or friend and talk about the biggest changes you want to see you in your life. Work out what you need to do now to begin to make that happen.
4. Look realistically at earning ambitions. What do you need to be a top 10% candidate in your chosen field? What experience, skills, or changes in attitude do you need to earn above the average for your age band?
5. Reward yourself for every small step taken. Find supporters to keep you focused and on track.
6. Every time you make a choice, ask yourself ‘how does this move me towards my ultimate goal?’
