The world can certainly be a daunting place. As a parent, one of the most important responsibilities is helping your children to navigate it with confidence. You obviously can’t force your child to be more self-assured. But there are steps you can take to raise them in an atmosphere that influences the way they approach life and their propensity to fully engage with it.
Perhaps the most important influencing factor in this regard is your own behaviour. Your children look to you first and foremost for clues to interact with the world. They observe how you overcome hurdles and the authority with which you handle daily life. You may not always feel confident. Nobody does. But there are parenting skills you can develop to more effectively provide your children with the tools that help them develop greater self-confidence.
Open Communication
Communication is key to confidence. As such, your parenting skills should be formed around open and honest communication. This applies to how you interact with your children, other members of your family, and your friends. When your children see your high standards here and grow up around a culture of active communication, they are better able to confidently interact with the world.
Start with a routine of regular discussions about various areas of life. This can range from the superficial aspects of the day to the deep concerns of your family. Encourage your children to do the same. Importantly, show them how open communication involves not having knee-jerk angry reactions to problems. Rather, utilize frank and supportive conversations.
One benefit of this open communication is it gives your children the tools to confidently navigate difficult scenarios. Their generation is among the first digital natives and your kids will likely be making friends online. Excellent communication skills not only help them to connect with others meaningfully it can also keep them safe in this environment. They know they can talk to you about aspects they’re unsure of and ask questions. It also means there’s already an open door for you to have conversations with them about their new online friends and their digital behaviour.
Starting to develop these open communication skills as early as possible helps you to mitigate common challenges when they become teenagers. Teenagers can become more withdrawn as they get older, with studies suggesting the current generation are among the loneliest yet. Building a family culture around communication is valuable for everyone in this scenario. It creates an atmosphere in which they can confidently express themselves and seek guidance from you on the pressures they face.
Emotional Validation
There is often the sense that parents need to be emotionally distant from their children. It’s not unusual to feel you need to present a facade of being strong and confident in all circumstances. Yet this isn’t always the healthiest approach for anybody involved. Often, raising self-confident children requires you to develop abilities surrounding emotional acceptance and validation.
This starts with taking stock of your own emotional wellbeing. The challenges of parental mental unwellness can also harm children. When left unaddressed, illness or emotional imbalance can influence children’s own mental health. Not to mention that living with a parent struggling with illness can exacerbate a sense of vulnerability.
It’s important, therefore, to build skills in gaining self-awareness of your mental or emotional state. This isn’t about feeling guilty or weak. Rather you should consider it an empowering activity. Integrate moments of mindfulness and self-assessment into your daily routine. Make self-care as central to your life as your family, career, and hobbies.
Most importantly, be visible and vocal about your efforts here. Help your children to understand that emotional challenges are a valid and normal part of life. Encourage them to speak about their feelings and address difficulties with coping mechanisms similar to your own. This gets them into the mindset where their emotions and thoughts are not things to be ashamed of or hide. Rather, they can interact with a complex human experience confidently knowing they have the tools to thrive.
Keen Curiosity
Self-confidence isn’t just helpful for social interactions. It empowers your children to step out into the world and uncover enriching new experiences. As a parent, you can help influence your kids here by maintaining the skills to fuel your curiosity. Show your family through your actions that the most rewarding opportunities come from a commitment to digging a little deeper.
This doesn’t mean you need to necessarily head off on vast expeditions every day. It can start with reading. Don’t simply stick to books you know you’re going to enjoy. Regularly step outside of your comfort zone to delve into subjects you’re unfamiliar with. This can extend to your choices when reading to your children. Make this part of your regular discussions with your family. Talk about what you’re reading, why you’ve chosen it, and what you’ve been learning.
One vital aspect of this skill set is showing your children you don’t have all the answers to their questions. Parents can tend to avoid showing this form of vulnerability, but it can be a valuable experience for adults and children alike. Take the opportunity to admit you don’t know but you can find out the answers together. Embark on shared research and perhaps visit museums and exhibitions. This not only strengthens your bond, it also gives your children the confidence to independently learn as they get older.
Conclusion
The skills you gain and use as a parent can have an impact on how self-confident your children become. Open communication practices can both mitigate the potential for isolation and bolster their safety. Your mental self-knowledge and care can instil the importance of emotional validation. Remember that maintaining curiosity empowers your children to step outside of their comfort zone and enrich their lives. By being open with your experiences here, you can not only improve your child’s confidence but also build a more positive relationship.
