First dates are exciting, stomach butterfly inducing, and also mildly terrifying. On one hand, men are afraid of saying something stupid or unintentionally offensive. And on the other, women spend way too many hours preparing and often aren’t fully satisfied with what’s in the mirror.
These first date anticipations can be terror inducing, especially if the date itself goes any way but fantastically.
Unfortunately, there is something more stressful than the date itself-the second date. Who calls whom? What are you going to do for said second date? How long do you wait before planning it? This is all of course if both parties want a second date to happen.
It’s common knowledge that relationships are difficult, complicated, and should be a science in of itself. That is why we assume talking about post-date expectations totally makes sense. Recently, while browsing through some online platforms, I came across widowed dating, a niche community that focuses on helping those who have lost a spouse find new companionship. The concept intrigued me, especially because it approaches relationships from a different perspective—where emotional healing and understanding are prioritized. In these spaces, conversations about post-date expectations seem to take on a deeper meaning, as both men and women are encouraged to be open about their feelings and intentions. It’s rare for a woman to reach out and set the game plan for a second date (consider yourself lucky if you find one!), but platforms like this are reshaping those traditional dynamics, allowing both sides to communicate more freely about second date plans.
But by the end of the first date, most already know whether or not a second date will be in the stars. And we’re used to a certain time period that’s considered acceptable for scheduling the second date. Like the “wait three days before you call” rule, if you like the girl. Or you can’t seem too interested at first for fear of scaring them away. You know the game – we’ve all played it at one point or another. But sadly, the game varies from player to player. So what’s a good rule of thumb about what to do or ask for a second date? Assuming you’re a man asking out a woman, consider planning something fun that she made an offhand comment about during the date, like she mentioned she’s always wanted to go horseback riding but has never had the chance to go. Boom, memorable and exciting second date right there.
But is there anything you should avoid while in the awkward dating, ‘what are we exactly’ phase? Dating and relationships are difficult and always come with a certain set of rules and etiquette to abide by. Avoid making any superficial comments on her appearance or attire-it usually comes off as a douche move or as incredibly shallow. Plus, rude. Also, it’s super easy to make fun of somebody early on in order to break the ice but everyone has their “do not cross here” lines that once crossed, there’s no going back-no matter how well the date(s) had gone prior to said event. Also, whose good idea was it to talk about long term plans on a first date? You’re trying to make it through dinner without looking like an idea and now the person sitting across from you wants to know how many kids you want or what you want to name your goldfish when you move in.
So there you have it. Some good guidelines to navigate the dating world with. It’s a messy, complicated realm but once you snag a good one, it can be a really exciting time. Now get out there and have some fun!
