Lonely on Valentine’s Day? Here’s 5 Tips From a Psychologist
As many people struggle with feelings of loneliness and isolation on Valentine’s Day, one psychologist looks more closely at how we can break away from the emphasis on romantic connections.
While love may be in the air for some, for many who are spending Valentine’s Day alone, the holiday can trigger feelings of isolation and anxiety. Modern society places a special emphasis on romantic relationships every February 14th, but holidays of celebration can be especially hard for those who are coping with difficult mental health situations. According to a BetterHelp survey, 15 million adults find that their mental health is worse around Valentine’s Day.
“The emotional toll that holidays like Valentine’s Day can have on those without a partner has always been acknowledged,” says Natalie Buchwald, a psychologist from Manhattan Mental Health Counseling. “Rather than simply brushing it under the mat, many should be looking at how to address those feelings proactively.”
In an effort to help people avoid the mental strain that often comes with Valentine’s Day, Natalie Buchwald offers YCB readers her expert insights on how to foster emotional well-being and self-love during this period.
“Self-love and self-compassion are vital during the holidays, as the external world feels like it can put a lot of undue pressure on us,” says Natalie. “Recognizing that these societal pressures around relationship status are just cultural constructs and focusing on the self is the best way to protect your emotional well-being.”
“Valentine’s Day can heighten the perceived importance of romantic relationships as part of a full and fulfilling life, but focusing on that can be like missing the forest for the trees,” adds Natalie. “By framing how you look at yourself, you can see the activities and efforts you can take to reassure yourself of your self-worth.”
Here are Natalie Buchwald’s top five strategies for coping and thriving alone on Valentine’s Day:
1. Practice Self-Compassion
Avoid negative self-talk, treating yourself with kindness, understanding, and patience. Speak to yourself in the same caring and supportive way that you would talk to a friend. Acknowledge your feelings of disappointment while still reminding yourself that you are worthy of love and connection.
2. Reframe Your Mindset
Cognitive reframing is a strategy that involves changing how you think in response to negative emotions. Rather than focusing on “being alone on Valentine’s Day,” recognize the opportunity to engage in different kinds of love, from family to friendships.
3. Practice Gratitude
Practicing gratitude, such as writing down things you are grateful for, helps shift your perspective to see what’s positive in your life. This could be your friends, career achievements, personal goals, or hobbies.
4. Try Mindfulness
Engaging in mindfulness activities like meditation or deep breathing can help you stay present without judgment. Accept your feelings without trying to change them, understanding that emotions are temporary.
5. Avoid Being Physically Alone
Surrounding yourself with people you love can help alleviate feelings of loneliness. Spending time with friends and family fosters a sense of belonging and self-worth.